Is it possible to find a man your friends haven’t already slept with?  Philip Tetro, star of MTV’s 1Girl5Gays doesn’t think so, blogging his ideas on it and chatting with GGT publisher Shaun Proulx:

It is impossible to find a single gay guy in Toronto who hasn’t slept with, or at least dated, one of your good friends. All it takes is one click on “Mutual Friends” on Facebook to find that you have over 30 friends in common. All it takes is a single picture of the guy on your phone, shown to everyone at Sunday brunch, to have everyone tell you that he slept with someone you know who dated another friend in 2007. All it takes is for the two of you to be at Woody’s on a Thursday night and have the guy tell you two of his ex-boyfriends are here.

It’s fucking terrifying.

For someone who hasn’t been on a date in three months, it’s scary to know that the next guy I find online or at a bar will probably have fucked someone I know. I wonder if I’ll have to start going on ManHunt Napanee just to meet someone that hasn’t slept with one of my friends.

… it’s scary to know that the next guy I find online or at a bar will probably have fucked someone I know …

When I talk to people about this, apparently they are surprised at my disdain for wanting to be a “sloppy second,” if you will. I guess I missed some sort of unspoken agreement in the gay community that tells you that it’s completely normal and acceptable to sleep with someone, even after you are both aware that you have fucked the same people.

That boggles my mind. It boggles my mind that when I bring the man I’m dating to a social event, he’s already potentially slept with a quarter of the gay men there. It boggles my mind that I people are shared and tossed around like sexual clowns, going from one party to the other.

Must I be the first to say “no”? Must I be the one who ends this? I must. I, Philip Tetro, declare today that I will no longer become romantically involved with another man who has slept with someone I know. Even under the influence of several $2 vodka-cranberries, I will not take someone home who is the ex-boyfriend of a friend of mine. I refuse to be second best, baby!

Someone really needs to make me a membership card so I don’t forget the rules.

- Philip Daniel Tetro

Last Friday was the huge kick off party to PRIDE WEEK TORONTO 2010 at Woody’s on Church Street.  Food, booze, friends, performances and skin! Miss Conceptions doing Lady Gaga and my fiance Shaun Proulx being interviewed by The National Post!

This year marks PRIDE TORONTO’S 30th year of celebrations, and I was there to catch it all!

Last night I attended my first Christmas party of the season. I had a blast schmoozing with so many characters from the Church Street scene.  The food seemed never-ending. Even my Italian grandmother would have said, ‘This is a bit excessive.” As usual, a drag queen was a little schmammered. Or maybe it was jet lag? (Don’t worry Gurl, egg nog gets me too.)

One of the highlights of my night was watching local photographer David Hawe walk around with his digital camera, snapping photos of people so that he could later strategically photoshop angry cats and peopleofwalmart.com into the background. If you have no clue what I am referring to, I suggest you have a look at his Coronation photos from this past year on his Facebook. They are HILARIOUS! The man is a genius.

Before the party, I went to see my drag mother, Miss Conception wow the crowd during her Stage to Screen show (Woody’s, 6pm). This week she opened with an outstanding Liza set, followed by an homage to Shirley Temple and Baby Jane. She is truly an unstoppable force on Church Street. Week after week, she packs them in. Why? Because her shows are new and fresh every Sunday. In my opinion, her show is better than cable. She has more talent in her pinky than a lot of queens have had in their 20 something year careers. If you haven’t checked out Miss Conception’s Stage to Screen show, head on down to Woody’s this Sunday.

So, I’m fat. I’ll give you a moment to let it sink in. I know, it shocked me too, but I am a big girl. I’ve decided I’m going to lose weight for Christmas and the New Year, and to keep myself motivated I will be doing it publicly through this blog. I plan on approaching a few gyms in the area and talking to them about possible sponsorship for what I’m calling ‘Honey, they shrunk the drag queen’. If you own a gym and are interested in a drag queen spokesmodel, give me a shout. [email protected].

Tonight I’m heading on down to The Varsity to see a VIP screening of Tom Ford’s ‘A Single Man’. Unfortunately, everyone I’ve asked is busy. So, I’m going alone. How ironic and a tad bit depressing. Oh well. Until next time…

With love and venom,

Heroine Marks

xoxo

http://www.heroinemarks.com

Saturday night + Horny + In Toronto’s gaybourhood = You do the math!