Well, it’s been a long time coming. For decades Toronto has been a destination for gays throughout the world. They flock to our little village year after year to celebrate Pride, walk hand in hand with their loved ones and to, well, you know. But the one thing about our world famous gay village that’s always annoyed me is how “un gay” our street is! Year after year, through tourist after tourist, our beloved village has has been the least gay thing about the LGBT community! Drab building after drab building have lined our gay strip, keeping the makers of monotonic paint hues farting through silk. Our dark buildings have always been overshadowed by less gay neighbourhoods, like Newfoundland’s multicoloured Jelly Bean Row for instance: every colour in the proverbial rainbow is slapped on houses in St. John’s and yet Church Street has remain dark and drab for years…until now! Enter the Rainbow! Thanks to the recent appearance of Pizzaiolo and their bright red facade their neighbour, the newest club on the strip – Flash followed suit with passionate purple! Not to be out done, the venerable Sailors gave themselves a much needed facelift as well! Okay, a new coat of paint but it’s bright blue and gorgeous! Finally colour on the gayest strip in Canada! Hopefully the rest of the businesses will follow suit. Rainbow it up people!

Depending on whom you listen to, the Village (Church & Wellesley) is either dead, on life support or just going through a renaissance period of rebirth and reinvention. While die-hards stand by the venerable Village steadfastly, many on the Street and in the media are sounding the death knell as bars and businesses shut shop for good or for lower rents in other areas. Is Church Street dead or merely resting? Read the full story

Okay, first of all I’m sorry for my absence. Secondly, What’s happening to Church Street?

It’s the straight elephant in the gay room, Church Street’s a changin’. High rents and a shitty economy has had a hand in the closings of such businesses as Crews/Tango, Zelda’s, Il Fornello and now Statler’s And in light of this, gays have quietly been moving out of The Village as well. Is The Village becoming a gay ghost town? Will some gay historians investigate the ruins in future years only to find me (let’s face it, I’ve got enough body fat to outlive you all!) in my shitty bachelor pad, watching Drew Barrymore movies? Will they?!
Sorry.
Anyway, is the economy killing Church Street? No. I blame gay rights. We now live in a world where it’s illegal to prejudice someone because they’re a homosexual. We don’t need The Village to protect us anymore. Now, ironically the government does. And it’s been slapping us in the face ever since! Now corporate straighties are seeking out our gay dollars by stamping their brand over all our rainbows. TV and movies are lousy with dykes and fags. We’re no longer something to be feared. We’re good for one dinner invite and a few decorating/renovating tips at least.
I long for the days when it was wrong to be in a gay bar. The excitement that cops could bust in at any moment. Back door entrances (you heard me) and dirty looks if you got off the subway anywhere near Wellesley Station! Magazines with all the good stuff edited out. Being able to cruise Allen Gardens before the City got wise and cut down all the bushes. Those were the days. There were strength in numbers because we knew it felt good to be bad. And The Village was born.
I mean, don’t get me wrong. If it weren’t for gay rights, I wouldn’t be working at 103.9 Proud FM; a GAY radio station. But think about it…without gay rights, we’d be roving the city broadcasting our pirate signal and avoiding the law. HOT!