I had taken a break from posting. As the seasonal blues started drifting my way (and I’m not talking Christmas but the bleak sunless winter days) and negative forces were upon me, there was only one thing I could think of doing and that was make a gratitude list.

This is just a start and I’ll post more as they come along.

Gratitude List 2009

I’m grateful for:

(added Dec 30) God sending me the most beautiful cock in a state of semi erection in the showers of the YMCA, and at the same time allowing me to shower next to the cute red head that I finally got to see naked who lives in my building.

(Dec 29) getting laid

-the great friends who’ve learned to trust to simply be myself.

-the lesbian couple co-parenting my PTSD dog

-my little Hildy, 2.5 pound Chihuahua

-my sponsor made it out of the hospital and is doing well

- finally finding the courage to challenge myself and take health risks despite my great fear of leaving what I know for something new.

-my great voice coach Christine, a woman who it turns out I can tell everything to, and I mean everything, and she doesn’t bat an eye.

-all the tremendous community support

-all the great partnerships, for those who come together to work on positive visions instead diverseness

-Obama was elected

-Joan Rivers on The Celebrity Apprentice

-My big über gay pilgrimage to see Mylène Farmer at the Stade de France, Paris – Love this video, the uncensored version with lots of body covered in blood in a church images. It upset a lot of Catholics. That’s my girl.

-my 92-year-old grandma is still around.

-being able to reconnect with friends in Europe

-having been able to visit Mexico City and see my Rwandan friends who came in for the conference.

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I’ve been sick ever since my trip to Newfoundland. At first it wasn’t much but a mild cold. But then I got my H1N1 shot. Having asthma and being positive does have its queue jumping privileges. It’s about the only thing I have in common with a few sports teams, and Goldman Sachs employees.

However, I do NOT recommend getting the shot with a mild cold, as I have had fevers and felt like shit ever since. That was last Tuesday.

[Since reading the update I have to be clear I do not regret getting the shot, just that I did will having something else going on. And in fact I wanted the shot so much I was willing to take the risk. However, once taken, and feeling the effects of having done that, I'd recommend that one waits until the cold is over before getting the shot]

In the meantime I went back to this old footage to edit up the first top ten reason I need to get laid. I can safely say, I’ve probably come up with another then since the making of this clip.

These first few webcasts are me playing around getting a feel for the medium, and the editing process. And since I’m declaring I need to get laid, why not have my shirt off? It’s a bit desperate, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

The final five will give the number one way to get my legs in the air.

This is not how to it, at least by my experience.

Man have I been negligent in my writing this week. While everyone was coming off their coke/crystal/alcohol/ecstasy slash whatever ever combo post-pride crash, I was crashing in my own way.

Eight days off of Lithium……. Read the full story