QUEEN :: Madonna won her second Golden Globe for the masterpiece of a song she wrote and co-produced for the W.E soundtrack, “Masterpiece.” The song is a haunting ballad about a relationship with someone who is untouchable. For the past three weeks, I’ve used the song to get me through a friendship that’s going through a rough patch right now. My heart is absolutely broken and, as always, Madonna knows what’s up. She sings “nothing’s indestructible,” “I’m right by your side,” and “I will not renounce all hope.” All these things I feel about the situation going on with my friend right now, and so looking forward to the Golden Globes meant so much more to me this year than just Madonna’s appearance (more on that, later). As soon as she was announced as the winner, I burst into tears and was so relieved. I was, of course, so thrilled for Madonna and the fact that still her music was being recognized after thirty years as an artist, but it was like a sign that “Masterpiece,” something I’ve relied on to get me through a tough time, was a winner for me, too. It gave me hope that, like thousands of other times in my life, that a Madonna song was an audible map to whatever is going on, and that she understands my pain – everything is okay. Nothing’s indestructible.

Okay, enough about me. Let’s talk about that horrible, metallic, silver dress. Horrible. Her hair looked like she just got out of the pool with her kids, her make-up was hardly there, her tits were squished, and her shoulder-pads looked like doilies. I was not impressed with this look at all, but she did seem excited and happy. Not to mention how flirty, funny, and quirky she was! I guess that’s all that really matters. I feel like she should have made a much better statement with her look, however – a new film, album, tour, video, and SuperBowl performance around the corner, and that’s the effort she put into it? It was definitely a letdown, especially after how good she’s been looking over the past few weeks during major interviews all around the world. Kick it up a notch, honey. The whole world is watching.

Elton John is a sore loser. Case closed. I am sorry that Madonna has been honest about your child’s Godmother recently, but to publicly bash someone that way you did, Sir (pun-intended), especially someone nominated in the same category as you, is just childish. We’re all so sorry that your career has sucked since The Lion King. Speaking of royalty, don’t forget who the real Queen is.

This year has already been filled with enough Madonna that I can hardly keep up (just kidding). It’s like the Universe knows how to keep my mind occupied during tough times. And, as always, I’m left with Madonna to show me the way. Not that I ever doubted her guidance. Big things coming up in Madonnaland in the coming weeks, and I am so thrilled to be able to share it all with you! I can’t wait to stand in front of my masterpiece.

Philip Tetro is our resident Madonnaologist. He’s created a religion-based lifestyle, worshipping everything she’s ever done. You can also catch him as a regular panelist on MTV Canada’s 1 girl 5 gays. Philip also blogs on non-Madonna topics here. If you can believe it.

“We’re making our way across Canada right now, because this is where we started!” So declared Heart lead vocalist Ann Wilson to an adoring, sold out crowd at Toronto’s Massey Hall. Heart has been on a 20-city tour across the land where it all began and they have been blowing people’s minds at every stop. The Toronto show was no different.

The band took the stage to the undulating beats of Cook With Fire, Nancy wearing a customized hockey jersey with the band’s name emblazoned across the front. When Ann walked out and took her place at centre stage, the crowd went ballistic. The band blasted through a series of hits from the 70s and 80s, including Heartless, What About Love and Straight On and a very beautifully reworked version of Dog and Butterfly, with Ann’s voice soaring and sinuously wrapping around the lyrics.

The apotheosis of the night may have been Ann’s spectacular delivery of their song, Alone

Nancy took the spotlight to sing two Heart hits, their first number one, These Dreams—beautifully done on mandolin with Ann gently strumming a black acoustic guitar behind her. She then brought out a dulcimer and performed their latest hit, Hey You, a sing-along acoustic romp with a “na-na-na-na-na” chorus, yet with deceptively melancholic lyrics. Ann took the mic for the title track from their latest album, Red Velvet Car, a song about undying love and support for a friend.

The apotheosis of the night may have been Ann’s spectacular delivery of another number one song, Alone. Stripped down from its 80s bombast and flash, the song was done with just Nancy’s acoustic guitar and Debbie Shair’s keyboards. Ann’s voice was front-and-centre as she deftly handled the changing keys until she came to the climax of the song with a passionate roar that showed she is still one of the finest, most powerful singers in music—and brought the entire audience to its feet for a thunderous ovation.

From then on it was unabashed rock: the new screed, WTF, followed by a trio of classics, Magic Man, Crazy on You and Barracuda. The band came back for two encores, Zeppelin’s What is and What Should Never Be and the Who’s Love Reign O’er Me, both showing the band’s dexterity and passion, and, of course, Ann Wilson’s remarkable pipes. After a few minutes of unbridled cheering, Heart took the stage for one last song, the title track from the album that got it all started back in 1976, Dreamboat Annie. It was a poignant and deliciously sweet end to the show.

Enjoy this clip from Toronto show (and check out Ann’s awesome boots):

Aside form going to a concert and enjoying the performance, I’ve always been in the habit of checking out who else is there. Since I like rock bands, I long ago got in the habit of having a look at who was in the crowd. I think part of it was self-preservation because I’m gay and was nervous I’d be “spotted” by possible bashers. But the other thing was to see if there were any other gay folks there. To my surprise, I started to notice more and more gay men and women at rock concerts—particularly at Heart concerts. Hey, I went to last week’s Toronto show with a few gay men, one straight woman, and we later met lots of lesbians.

“I think that a lot of gay people…appreciate the power in individuality that we represent, inside
of a restrictive culture.” – Nancy Wilson

Before Heart set off on their current Canadian tour, I asked Nancy why she thought Heart has such a large gay following. As best she can figure, it’s because “we always broke the mold, and never have conformed to the prescribed sexual agendas of typical expectations.” She went on to explain, “I think that a lot of gay people relate to us and appreciate the power in individuality that we represent, inside of a restrictive culture.”

Certainly, Ann and Nancy were outsiders in the male-dominated rock world when they got started and they wouldn’t play the game when it came to sexism and other favours that were expected from them by some people in the industry back in those days. Being a woman in rock was one thing. Being gay in rock was another. Though neither Ann nor Nancy is gay, they have lots of friends in the industry who are, including Rufus Wainwright and Elton John (both of whom sang with Ann on her recent solo album, Hope and Glory). As well, they support LGBT causes, performing at a variety of benefits.

I wondered if it has changed or gotten any easier for gays in the rock world or is it still relatively status quo. “I think it’s more appreciated than ever across the board worldwide,” Nancy opined. “But the boys club in America still drives us nuts, too.”

Over the past 35 years, Ann and Nancy Wilson have created incredible music inside Heart, as solo artists and in their “hobby band” the Lovemongers (a band that spawned the society of diehard fans called the Heartmongers). Through the years they have performed with power, passion—and dignity. They never compromised their art or their ethics. I think that’s one of the reasons fans have been so devoted and loyal to these women.

I asked Nancy that, when all is said and done, how would she like to be remembered in music history. She said, “I would like to be remembered like a romantic poet, and a one-of-a-kind-goddess.”

Hey Nancy…done and done!

Madonna. Monroe. Minogue. Cher. Gaga. Streisand. Garland. These are just a few of the classic icons gay men revere and have admired for decades. They are recognized as beacons in the fight for rights. They are lauded as survivors who triumphed in the face of adversity to become legendary. They are all considered to be powerful women of their time (and some, tragic icons). What’s missing from the list? Men.

Gay men have long pointed to and acknowledged women as cornerstones in the queer movement. Some are bestowed status because they were victims of their own existence in times they didn’t conform to, while others are cheered for their power, determination and sheer fortitude. Read the full story

Over the weekend Sir Elton John cancelled a few dates on his Face2Face tour with Billy Joel because he is sick. According to reports and Sir Elton’s own website, he’s been felled by a combination E.coli bacterial infection and influenza.

I first saw the story on CBC.ca and had a quick glance at the comments board below the story. Among the wishes for a speedy recovery there was a peppering of idiotic comments that he must have AIDS. Naturally, because he is a gay man, he must have AIDS and that the flu/E.coli was a “planted” story. I read, rolled my eyes and put it down to the usual coterie of morons that crawl around the Web spreading this type of bigoted BS.

This morning as I was having my coffee I was channel surfing the stereo when I landed on Toronto’s frat boy (formerly “edgy” but now banal) radio station. I stopped because I heard the tragically moronic morning show jocks talking about the Elton John story. Read the full story

Every once in a while I get burr in my shorts about the way the media reports gay-esque news. I find it interesting the way certain media outlets put certain spins on queer news stories. To wit:

Queer by Numbers

Last week I was listening to the morning news when I heard a story that Toronto Pride was throwing their hat in the ring for Toronto to host 2014 World Pride. What ticked me off was that the report basically said what they say about Pride every year: “it is expected to bring 100 million dollars into the local economy”.

I haven’t been living under a rock the past year, I realize that any positive economic news and stimulus is big news, but this is what gets said every year. I guess it smacks of quantifying and qualifying the “big gay party” to make it digestible to the masses. Read the full story