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Last night, I treated myself to a pre MLT weekend night out at the movies by myself. Anyone who remembers the episode of Sex and the City where Carrie goes to the movies by herself on movie night can imagine my much gayer and somewhat low rent version of this. Just me and Telus Tuesdays at the Scotiabank Theatre (11.65$ gets you a big thing of popcorn, a pop and an adult ticket). No I wasn’t there to oggle shirtless jailbait werewolves, I was there for one of the year’s most talked about films.
Precious – Based on the novel Push by Saphire, the story of a young woman facing unimaginable odds in 1980s Harlem. I am not going to go into too many details as that has been rehashed and talked about constantly. I want to talk about Monique. The actress and comedian, plays Precious’s mother Mary. Mary is one of those characters that will break your heart in so many ways. Specifically, the scene between Mary, Precious and Ms. Weiss (played by Mariah Carey), is the kind of thing that make me love film. This is what Faye Dunaway wishes her performance was in Mommy Dearest. While Mary is a monster, she also gives us insight into that monstrosity. How could someone hate their own child so much? How could they let the horrible things happen to their daughter? Her performance sheds light on some of the darkest parts of the human soul.
Another person in this film is Gabourey Sidibe. A young woman who has never done anything beyond a school play, makes the break out performance of a life time. After seeing press for the film, I am blown over by how Gabby is not Precious. She so deftly inhabits the role, that I expect her to speak, walk, and essentially be the same person as we see in the film. I think that should she fall into obscurity it will be one of the greatest tragedies of Hollywood. As an overweight, dark skinned woman of African descent, her roles will surely be limited. But this performance proves you don’t need to be Charlize Theron to undergo an astounding transformation worthy of infinite praise.
In small roles, we also have some really great talent. Mariah Carey is actually amazing in it. Her disdain for Mary is almost palatable. Sherri Shepard sans wig & Lenny Kravitz round some of the more famous faces. Paula Patton plays the teacher working to save a small group of inner city girls from their circumstances. And I really enjoyed that she was a fully realized character. Acting in what would be Precious’ best interest. She even goes so far as to suggest that Precious give her two children up for adoption in order to focus on improving her own circumstances. A truly heartwarming scene occurs between Patton’s character and her female lover as they take Precious in for Christmas. Precious says in a voice over how her mother always said how homos are evil, and sick. But as she points out homos had taken her in for the holidays, fed and clothed her, even bought her presents without really knowing her. Homos had never raped her, beaten her, made her feel shame and disgust with herself.
I can not recommend this film enough. There will be no clean cut happy ending, there will be heart break. But most importantly there will be hope.
Tags: David Ivey, GayGuideToronto.com, GGT, GGT 2.0, HIV, Lee Daniels, Oprah, Oscars, Precious, sodomy & the city, Thought
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So I haven’t blogged in an almost heinous amount of time. And as such I am going to do a redux of some of the things I would have been blogging about had I not been so busy with my numerous other engagements.
Become Part of the Tribe
A few weeks have passed since Northbound Leather’s annual Fetish Extravaganza, but the images are still quite fresh in my head. The fashion show, this year was told in a narrative form seeing a young initiate as he goes through a series of trials to become a full fledged member of a very kinky tribe. Marty Rotman and his team truly out did themselves with this one. Not only were the fashions mind blowing (Ranging from Mad Max to CBGB to Ancient Africa to Vampires), the over all exploration of the different roots of kink and fetish were so inspired and well produced. It was as if the over all underlying message was one of normalization. That these things all have their roots in other cultures. The theme of Tribe was the perfect one. That no matter our kinks we all stand together as part of a tribe. A chosen family.
You Are Still In The Running To Be The Next Mr. Leatherman Toronto…
So one of the reasons I have been so busy is that I am now a title holder in the leather community. Through a series of odd and somewhat controversial events I ended up becoming Mr. Woody’s Priape. As such, I have been attending alot of events in the community, making appearances etc. I am having so much fun, and it has really gotten be back into being involved in the community. After all my younger leather friends moved away I kind of just didn’t have the energy to brave going out alone and making new leather friends. And already I have found some amazing friends in my fellow 2o1o title holders. And a week from today begins the MLT weekend, with the Mama Does Toronto party at the Black Eagle. The excitement well out ways the nerves in all of this. And I hope to see you the reader at some of these events (the full list can be found here). And don’t forget that none other then Shaun Proulx will be hosting the contest along with David Kloss (The first Mr. International Leather). They hosted last year and did a fabulous job, and will surely continue to amaze.
I also am one of the youngest (if not the youngest) contestants in MLT history. In a class of some of the youngest title holders (only 2 are over 3o). So wish me luck! Also don’t forget to check out the Toronto Bootblack Contest a the Black Eagle the afternoon of the 28th.
Tags: David Ivey, GayGuideToronto.com, GGT, GGT 2.0, goals, Leather, MLT, sex, Shaun Proulx, Sodomy & The City
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On the tails of the news that our fair city of Toronto has been named the host of World Pride 2014, terrible news began to spread through word of mouth and the internet. In the early hours of Sunday the 18th, Chris Skinner, a 20 something gay man was attacked and then run over by a group of men in a black SUV. He was taken to hospital and died of his injuries shortly there after. You can read all about the details here, including if you have any information which may help with the investigation. Toronto Police have said they do not feel the murder was motivated by homophobia, but there seems little reason otherwise. The Entertaintment District is well known for its less then open mindedness, and it hasn’t taken long for the conclusions to be drawn.
The bigger issue I want to make here, is that homophobia is terrorism. Attacks like this, or even much less violent more nuanced versions of homophobia act to terrorize queer people. They seek to make us afraid to be who we are. To be afraid to leave our neighborhood. To be afraid to walk home alone at night, lest we fall victim to an attack much like the one that befell Chris Skinner.
From outright hate crimes to systematic homophobia to Prop8, these seek to terrorize us. It is disgusting to think that the same city could be host to one of the worlds largest annual Pride parades, I for one will not allow myself to be terrorized.
Tags: Chris Skinner, David Ivey, gay rights, GayGuideToronto.com, GGT, GGT 2.0, GLBT, homophobia, Pride, Toronto
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“We must not be free because we claim it but because we practice it.” William Faulkner
As Canadians prepare to gorge ourselves on turkey and carbs, your brothers and sisters to the south prepare for one of the biggest queer rights demonstrations in history. This weekend, LGBTQ activists will march on Washington as part of a demonstration demanding equal treatment under the law. Gay history is a long a complex one, but the most pertinent of it can be seen in the 20th and 21st century. Starting with Berlin, once a gay mecca, plagued by Nazi Germany’s extermination of homosexuals in addition to the Jews, and other “undesirables” who would lose their lives during the Holocaust. To the Stonewall Riots, the decriminalization of homosexuality in Canada, and the subsequent struggle for rights for all queer people.
Living in the city, we often forget how transgressive our everyday lives are. My average day involves countless things I would be unable to do had I never moved to Toronto. Ours all would. Our freedom is built on the backs of those who came before us. Were it not for Drag queens and dykes at Stonewall where would the revolution be? More conservative leaning gay people especially it seems in North America seem to not want Drag Queens, Leather people, or any open displays of blatant sexuality (ie topless dykes or gogo boys in underwear) to be part of Parades. But I am quick to remind people that our own Pride Parade (one of the world’s largest), was all the result of the police raids on bathhouses. What place is a more blatant symbol of our communities sexual freedom? Were it not for the sexually adventurous, what would Pride be like in Toronto? Would it even exist?
We must embrace our freedoms, and just as importantly ALL people in our communities. We should be grateful that we can even have a parade. That it is no longer called a march. We no longer have to climb the steps of Capital Hill demanding some of the most basic rights. So this thanksgiving, remember we all have something to be thankful for!
Tags: David Ivey, gay rights, GayGuideToronto.com, GGT, GGT 2.0, GLBT, homophobia, media, same sex marriage
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I used to work in a bathhouse. I used to work midnights in a bathhouse. I was a supervisor on the midnight shift at a bathhouse. Take a moment to imagine, and then come back and join me for a story.
I am not going to name the bathhouse I used to work at. It was one of the most popular ones in Toronto, and many of you the readers may recognize me from working there. It was a shitty segment of my life, mostly due to working midnights. When you arrive at work at 11 3o PM and leave work at 8 15 AM, working thursday through monday you aren’t able to have much of a social life. You don’t have much time to date, and why bother since all the men you meet are naked and looking for casual sex. You wake up and its dark, and go to bed when it’s light out.
Add to this, that you regularly get yelled at by customers. You call security at least once a night on weekends to have someone removed. I had several overdoses when I worked at this tub. No one died while I was there. At 20 I was calling 911 because customers had overdosed on GHB. I was threatened. A local queen assaulted 3 co workers during a coke fit, 2 of those co workers were 60 years old, and working the day shift. I had a customer smearing shit on peoples doors. I won’t even start on the hot tub. (more…)
Tags: bathhouse, David Ivey, drugs, GayGuideToronto.com, GGT, GGT 2.0, sex, work
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I reccently had a conversation with a co worker, in which she asked me “what are you?”. She followed this up with an explanation that she meant where did I fall within the categorizations of gay men. She had been having a conversation with a friend and mentioned me. When pressed to describe me, her friend asked what I was? A twink, bear, jock, art fag? This kind of categorization is not only incredibly delicate but at times pointless. My feelings on this topic may also come from my own inability to neatly fit into a certain category in the gay community. (more…)
Tags: Bears, David Ivey, GayGuideToronto.com, GGT, GGT 2.0, Leather, Malcom Ingram, sodomy & the city
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So it seems that many of my fellow bloggers are weighing in on what is quickly becoming a major issue in the queer community: The Criminalization of HIV. For those not familiar with the issue, this is when someone fails to disclose their status before engaging in something that leads to someone becoming infected with HIV and as a result faces criminal charges. These charges have gone from aggravated assault, to sexual assault to murder. This issue seems to be p0larizing alot of people, granted I think most people blogging about this on GGT pretty much all take the general stance of this being wrong. But the reasoning behind these stances are diverse and so I am going to register mine. (more…)
Tags: criminalization, David Ivey, GayGuideToronto.com, GGT, GGT 2.0, HIV, sex, sodomy & the city
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So I am going to warn you. I am going to be discussing ladies, vag, and the philosophical merits and idea of having sex with said ladies and perhaps sex with their vags. So if you are one of those gays that finds talk of pussoir utterly offensive, please head over to your favourite x tube video and ignore this. It may be a boner shrinker for some, and may cause gagging for others (many of you won’t have gagged in a long time). Now to those of you who are still with me I would like to discuss the idea of lady sex. (more…)
Tags: David Ivey, GayGuideToronto.com, GGT, GGT 2.0, GLBT, Lady, sex, sodomy & the city
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So contrary to what people think when they see me on the street or in the bar, I am very young. In fact, I just turned 22 last week. And having a preference for men who primarily fall outside my own age bracket, I encounter the age issue quite a bit. There are many different ways in which age can become an issue.
There are the times when it becomes important and usually a problem when becoming involved with an older guy. Being 22 I am not really ready to settle down, where as a good chunk of men in their 3os are more of the marrying type. Not that they want to get married, just that they are much closer to the point in their lives where they need stability and some semblance of normalcy. In situations like this, I completely understand age being an issue. If you’re looking for a partner to settle down with, you probably don’t want a 20 something, no matter how hot his ass may or may not be. (more…)
Tags: Age, dating, David Ivey, GayGuideToronto.com, GGT, GGT 2.0, sex, sodomy & the city
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Welcome to my brand new blog for Gay Guide Toronto! I am so happy to be able to share my thoughts with such a large audience. Despite the short little blurb about me, I will attempt a bit longer version. Giving you the reader, a chance to learn more about me, and also as a bit of background into entries to come. (more…)
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