Mar
03
InterACTion:
Sex. Drugs.
Love, lust and everything in between.
HIV and STIs.
Bars, baths and beyond.
Tell us what you think as we discuss a wide range of issues relevant to the health of gay men.
Don’t just sit there – InterACT!
Last month I attended the Gay Men’s Sexual Health Summit, and I thought to myself: it is time to reclaim my penis!
Nobody does it better than ourselves! Well, almost nobody. Who else knows exactly what makes you shiver? The art of masturbation; pleasuring yourself the old-fashioned way. I mean, what guy doesn’t do it? The question is: how often? And do you feel guilty afterward? Do you like an audience, either in the room across the hall, the stall next to you or through an open window? Does the sight of another man jerking his cock get you excited?
I think of times gone by and recall the quick toss-offs to avoid getting caught or to relieve tension, the long, slow edging sessions to produce the most pleasure, the fantasies fulfilled just by closing my eyes and recalling that afternoon in the gym changing room, or the wrestling match that held a bit more eroticism than is customary. Or the feel of a tight-skinned scrotum after swimming for an afternoon at the beach. Where have those days gone?
Do things have to change? Does being in a relationship mean you shouldn’t be jerking off anymore? Does your boyfriend/hubby/partner get upset that you would occasionally prefer to just pleasure yourself? Let’s be honest, a good hand job can be as wonderful as any other form of orgasm. I say it is time to reclaim the art of masturbation. Recall what makes you feel good. And guess what? You are old enough to play with different kinds of toys. Practice makes for a hell of a good time. Maybe even put on a show for that special someone. Seduce your man with a sensual display of auto-eroticism, and watch as he begins to copy your moves.
Okay, where was I? Oh yeah, the blog. So why not share some of your auto-eroticism “successes” with us. You know, you just may enjoy it!
-Harry
Feb
04
InterACTion:
Sex. Drugs.
Love, lust and everything in between.
HIV and STIs.
Bars, baths and beyond.
Tell us what you think as we discuss a wide range of issues relevant to the health of gay men.
Don’t just sit there – InterACT!
OK… IDK… ROTFLMAO, may b its JMO, and IANAL, nor a FISH but possibly an OF, NEway… OMG, IAC does NE1 out there no what I mean?
(Think YOU know what all of these letters stand for? Share your response in ‘Comments’, below. I dare you!)
Phew… that took a minute for me to figure out! Being online and reading someone’s cyber lingo can be a difficult task. It seems there is an abbreviation for just about everything. Some of these abbreviations can be confusing. I mean, I think I know what they mean, so I go ahead and use them too. It just seems to be the online culture, and let’s face it: regardless of age and internet savvy, we all want to fit in… to some degree, at least.
So what happens when we don’t really understand a term and we are too embarrassed to ask for clarity? We may end up being embarrassed anyway – or worse – get into some difficult situations.
Doing online outreach and reading chat room posts and bulletins, I realize that I am not alone. Recently, there was an interesting dialogue taking place on one of the sexual networking websites about “PnP” (party and play). That’s when I realized I was making assumptions. I thought PnP was simply using drugs while having sex. Okay, be honest: did you just think, “Well that’s what it is, stupid!” Well, welcome to my world. In fact, PnP is a much more complicated term than just figuring out what the letters stand for. For some, it means ‘poppers and pot’; for others, it means ‘clubbing and fucking.’
For those of us not in the know, partying generally refers to drugs that reduce inhibitions and are often taken in combinations. It could mean doing cocaine, smoking a joint, having a few drinks then doing crystal meth before hooking up with someone for a few hours of ‘wild sex.’
So what’s the big deal? You tell me. There were certainly a lot of views expressed in the bulletin board I read. What if a guy asked you online if you were into PnP and you responded, ‘yeah,’ thinking you’d have a joint? Well, you could be in for quite a surprise! Maybe this has already happened to you. What did you do? What did you think? Start talking, below!
- Harry
Jan
19
InterACTion:
Sex. Drugs.
Love, lust and everything in between.
HIV and STIs.
Bars, baths and beyond.
Tell us what you think as we discuss a wide range of issues relevant to the health of gay men.
Don’t just sit there – InterACT!
Really, I want you there, papito!
Is there anything better than a man who knows how to use his tool? Of course there is! Pleasure is a realm where every part of your body is important, especially those doors that keep the secret of forbidden delights. Oh, dear! Just thinking about it, I start to shake.
I have to admit that I’m curious about anal sex. I would like my papi to explore me, but every time we try, it’s really hard (and not in the good way)!
That’s why I’m going to attend the Phoenix workshops being offered at ACT. This is an amazingly explicit series of sessions, where gay men learn all there is to know about masturbation, anal massage and man-on-man intercourse.
I’m excited! I know I’m a great lover, but I want to enhance my skills, keep myself healthy, and – of course – I want to give my the key to the back door!
So guys! Book your spot! I want to tell you my stories, and I know all of us will learn something useful and interesting. I’ll be there, but you won’t recognize me. I will be in my boy-next-door costume.
Ciao!
Phoenix Workshops: Eroticism, Pleasure and Harm Reduction
For more information and to RSVP: contact Carlos at 416-340-8484 ext. 247 or crivas @actoronto.org
Open to all gay and bisexual men.
- Rita
InterACTion:
Sex. Drugs.
Love, lust and everything in between.
HIV and STIs.
Bars, baths and beyond.
Tell us what you think as we discuss a wide range of issues relevant to the health of gay men.
Don’t just sit there – InterACT!
Ooooh… Scary stuff! Well, actually it is – when you consider we’ve seen a dramatic increase in infectious syphilis over the past seven years in Toronto. But what makes it scary? I mean, syphilis has been treatable for nearly a century, so why should we even care? Do you care? Are you concerned about the curse?
Well, having an active sexually transmitted infection can increase your risk of contracting HIV by up to nine times. Did you know that if you are already HIV+, syphilis can not only increase the possibility of transmitting HIV to an uninfected partner, but if left untreated, it can progress to advanced (tertiary) syphilis in as little as 12 months? Now that is some scary shit.
Add to the mix that many people either don’t recognize the primary symptoms of syphilis, or have no symptoms at all.
So how do you avoid it? Well, the risk can be reduced by using a condom for anal and oral sex. I know, I know… Broken record… Use a condom, same old story. But it is still the most effective way we know to reduce risk. There are other ways, too. But you are a mature and sophisticated blog reader. You tell us: how have you avoided syphilis in the past? If you did get syphilis, how did you know/find out? What did you do? Where did you go for help?
- Harry
Every month, someone from our InterACTion panel will ask you what you think about issues that matter in our community – especially the topics we don’t usually talk about. To kick things off, Harry asks you your opinion on:
“HIV, are we really over it? “
Infection rates for new HIV transmissions in Toronto show that there is a continued increase in the rates for gay men. Does anyone really care? I mean from an existential point of view I think most people ‘care’, but what about from the completely personal perspective? I mean where do we stand on the subject now?
When I was in my late teens and early twenties HIV was a life and death epidemic. You never knew when you hooked up with someone whether or not you were doing something that could ultimately kill you.
In my thirties there was a ray of hope with an introduction of medications that could reduce an individual’s replication of the virus. There was access to anonymous antibody testing that let you know whether you were positive or not. We had scientific evidence of what activities could place you at risk. We had access to harm reduction materials and for a while the rates of transmission among gay men dropped significantly. HIV was no longer a death sentence.
Now in my forties, we have a few more pills to work with, we still have harm reduction resources, anonymous testing can give results in 20 minutes and we have greater awareness of HIV and how to live with it. But there is still no cure, and gay men are becoming infected at similar rates to what they were over 20 years ago. So what does this say about gay men? Are we really over HIV?
InterACTion is about YOU – Leave YOUR thoughts – are we REALLY over HIV? InterACT below!
Disclaimer: The comments expressed in InterACTion are those of the individual blogger and do not necessarily reflect the position of the AIDS Committee of Toronto.
